Overview
- Discipline
isn't just about punishment.
- People have
many concerns about bringing up children in the right way.
- Everyone wants
their children to:
- care about
others
- care about
the world
- be
interested in others
- be kind,
thoughtful and considerate
- behave
appropriately.
- Some people
think children can be spoiled by being given lots of attention. But
giving children lots of love and attention means they will be happy
and content with good self esteem.
- Children are
not naturally naughty. They usually respond to sensible, honest
comments which help them understand their behavior.
- Suggested
reading list of books which should be readily available at public
libraries: PRC has a number
of high-lighted books.
- 'Every
Parent, A Positive Approach to Children's Behavior' by Matthew
R.Sanders PhD Published by Addison-Wesley Publishing Company,
1992.
- 'Toddler
Taming, A parent's guide to (surviving) the first four years' by
Dr Christopher Green, published by Doubleday Australia Pty
Limited, 984.
- 'Coping
with the Family' by Dr John Irvine, published in Sun by Pan
Macmillan Publishers Australia in 1994
Talking
back
- Some
parents feel they must 'win' arguments with their children.
- If
there is a disagreement, explain the matter sensibly and calmly
to your child.
- If
they are treated as intelligent people they will react
positively.
- Make
sure you explain why you feel the way you do.
- Ask
the child why they feel the way they do and LISTEN to their
answer.
- If the
'argument' is over something dangerous, explain the dangers
calmly.
- If the
child is too young to understand, remove them from the danger.
Making
rules
- Many
people believe you should smack children. Children
want to do the right thing and are usually happy to
comply when things are explained simply to them.
- You
may like to make some rules and discuss them with your
child.
- If
there are problems perhaps you could ban television
for one day, send them to their room until they calm
down or make them sit absolutely still for a few
minutes. Find a way which suits you and your child.
- It
is important to be consistent. If you make a rule then
stick to it.
- Some
parents feel they must not let children 'get away'
with things. Set limits, rules and boundaries and give
reasons for these. Explain what behavior is acceptable
and why.
- Let
children be part of your family's decision making
process. Let them decide as many things as possible
for themselves, explain the consequences and if
necessary let them experience the consequences. This
way they will learn about themselves and self control.
- Rules
and boundaries can be set in a positive way:
- give
reasons for rules
- tell
your children what sort of behavior is acceptable
and why
- have
a few simple rules which help children decide what
is dangerous, destructive or disturbing to others.
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